Rocks and Hard Places

Last night, as I tried to console Shelbie and convince her that she wasn't going to die, I thought of all the hard things she has had to do in her life.  Now, it seems that we are to that difficult point, a rock and a hard place.  No longer are the doctors thinking that this episode of ITP was just a passing hiccup.  We have now moved to the chronic list and there is really no end in sight.  This may very well be her new normal. 
    It was so hard to see her sad eyes, lips quivering as she asked me for the 100th time if she was going to die.  I don't think she is going to die.  Not this week at least!  I just don't think God is done with her yet.  We had a nice talk about the realities of life, disease and all that.  I don't think she felt any better about her situation though.  Finally, at about midnight, she asked if the boys would sleep with her so if she died she wouldn't die alone.  The boys had just barely fallen asleep but I woke them up and dragged their mattresses onto her floor beside her bed.  They were so happy to help our their sister and I love that my kids love each other so much!  None of the kids have frames for their beds so it was kind of fun to see all three of them side by side, on the floor, filling the room.  I would have taken a picture but I'm sure that would have started a pillow fight and mayhem.  They don't like pictures on a good day when they are wide awake and feeling fine!
      This morning, she is emotionally better though the pressure is building in her head.  They called off school today so they are all laying in the living room watching a movie.  It's nice the boys can be home today.
        It's been sort of a stressful week.  Our sweet neighbor died on Monday and that shook us all up.  The kids and I have been really close to them and I was blessed with the opportunity to spend Monday morning with her.  I was also able to be with them right after she passed away. I hurried home to make dinner for the husband and some of their grown children who were starting to arrive.  It was after 6 when I got home and the boys got straight to work peeling potatoes, running to store for supplies and doing whatever needed to be done.  Shelbie was sick but helped a little too.  They were a huge help and I was able to have the meal ready just after 7 when the mortuary left.   It is so sad and I think maybe losing her is contributing to Shelbie's set back.  I am always glad for the opportunities every day we have to serve.  It really helps keep us sane around here.  I'm proud that my kids are learning that principle as well.


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