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Fresh out of funny

I promised something funny today but I'm fresh out of funny.   It started out to be a pretty good day.  Here is a conversation I had with Spencer at about 1:00pm.

"Mom, you won't believe this but I have the most amazing feeling in my stomach!"
"Really?  You're finally feeling better?"
"Like, it's nothing I have ever felt before! It's amazing.  You know when your stomach just feels amazing?"
"No, I only notice my stomach when it doesn't feel amazing.  Are you messing with me?  Do you really feel amazing or not?"
"Ha!  I am in the worst pain ever.  I feel like there is a little army of men in my stomach with swords and knives.  I am in amazing pain!"

He says all this with a smirk and grin on his face.  I never know with this kid!  Shortly after that, or sometime this afternoon, the bleeding started back up.   I'm guessing it had something to do with the amazing feelings he was having.

My quest to feed this boy protein was an epic fail today.  It's not because I didn't try but he doesn't eat much and I couldn't think of anything creative to make.  For dinner, I decided on slider burgers.  I was a big deal for me to break out some ground beef and make my own patties.  I made them rice paper thin.  As they sat in the pan, flatter than a pancake, I chuckled to myself as I thought about what the comments from the peanut gallery were going to be.  When I say thin, I mean, 1/8" thin.  I was determined to cook those clear through!  ha ha... No Salmonella in this house!  Well, in my kitchen.  I kept cloroxing the one flipper I had and cleaned it in between burger flips.  Yes, it was a production and yes, slightly obsessive and yes, even crazy!  Do I care?  No.

When I brought them to the table, the first comment was on how thin they were.  "These aren't your usual, thick sliders.  What happened?"

"I wanted to make sure they got cooked clear through so I made them thin...Salmonella and E Coli free!  You're welcome!"

They actually loved them!  They all had seconds.  Even as I type this, I'm laughing because seconds wasn't that hard to achieve, I should have taken a picture of how pathetic they looked, but, they said they were the best homemade hamburgers I've ever made!  Wow!  I was pretty surprised! That statement doesn't really say much for my cooking.  But rest assured, if you ever eat anything I make, you can be sure it was made in a sanitized kitchen with safer cooking habits than the environmental protection agency themselves!   Thank goodness these kids aren't too picky! I didn't exactly think they were the best but I did manage to choke one down and they were alright.  The bonus is that I only used like a 1/2 lb of hamburger for 8 patties!!  LOL...I'm a crazy person but they seem to love me.  I don't really get that but they do!

Tonight,  Spencer wasn't laughing when he was feeling incredibly nauseated and other stuff.  Some meds settled things down just in time for him to visit with his best friend.   He was also feeling a little discouraged about what to do with his life.  He doesn't think he can move back to Utah and keep the same schedule he kept and he even thinks that maybe his job will take more energy than he has left.  It's hard to judge next week on the way you feel today- still in the throws of illness.



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