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All on a Wednesday

Today was a day I wasn't expecting.

A little back story...last night, as we had family prayer, I expressed gratitude for Sam's good health the past few months.  When I was done Sam said, "MOM!  I thought you loved me!  Why did you have mention how good I have been?  You just jinxed me!"

"No I didn't Sam.  You are going to be fine."
Well this morning...not fine.

He woke up with a mouthful of sores.  It happens when his white count/neutrophils tank.  I'm guessing his white count is probably close to 1.  Maybe 1.5.  Low.  I numbed him up and sent him to school.

I had a busy morning with a big conference call for a hospital design project I am doing in Star Valley Wyoming.  I was suppose to be there but with everything going on, it just wasn't possible so they graciously allowed me to conference call them.

While I was on that call, Sam kept trying to call me.  He called about three times and sent a few text messages.  I had a very hard time trying to focus on the conversation knowing that something was wrong with Sam. He never calls in the middle of the morning unless something is wrong.  About 15 minutes later, he walked in the door.

He had lost half of his vision at school. I was not expecting that.  It hasn't happened in a few months so I kind of stopped worrying about it.  Just after I got him medicated and back to school, I had a doctor's appointment.

I found a lump in my breast two weeks ago.  I don't have any time at all for cancer.  It's just not something I'm into.  So, today, I met with the surgeon.  He agreed that it was not right and needed to come out.  We had planned to do the surgery on Friday.

At 3:45, I got a call that things had to change in the schedule and he wanted to do the surgery today.   I called Sam so he could drive me because Shelbie was working.  He had lost his keys so that took a minute or two to track those down but by some miracle, we got there in time.

Here's the was going to happen in his office.  I just didn't want to pay to be put under nor did I have time to spend the day in the hospital and he assured me that it would be pretty easy.  That's all well and good but I was so nervous!!  I'm not a huge fan of pain...or cancer.

So, things got underway and clearly, it was more detailed than expected.  It lasted almost two hours. There wasn't just one.  He found 4 (I think...I kind of lost count when we found out there wasn't just the one I found!)  tumors that he removed and he did an aspirate biopsy on 4 others. It didn't take long for me to have second thoughts about doing this wide awake!  It was hard!  And it was painful!  But it's done.  My surgeon is amazing and he and his nurse were so good to keep a conversation going in hopes of distracting me.  Even still, I wouldn't recommend having a lumpectomy wide awake.  It was just hard.  There were some vessels that wouldn't stop bleeding and it took a lot of cauterizing.  It was not fun.  Tonight, I am in so much pain.  I suppose tomorrow will be worse.

Okay, well enough of that.  Now we wait for pathology.  Sam is feeling better; well, his vision came back.  Shelbie is sick and has even more petechiae than yesterday. Her blood pressure is low and she is having a hard time catching her breath and nausea.  She's hardly eaten in three days. This is the third time this year, her platelets have dropped before her transfusion.  I feel like her ITP is back.  I just hope and pray that the transfusions will buy us some time and we can avoid chemotherapy but, what will be will be.  Tomorrow will be our marathon day at the hospital for her transfusion.  12 hours! Ugh.

Spencer is status quo.  No changes. Not one bit better.  Each day that passes without improvement just worries me.

And that's a wrap for this Wednesday...what a pain!  Literally!



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