Patience is a virtue

Patience is a virtue but only to a point.  I try, I really try to be patient but it's the kind of energy you can only keep up for so long and then snap!

Today proved to be that moment where my threshold for patience was met.

Sam's test results are sitting the desk of not one, but two doctors; the Cardiologist and the Pulmonologist.  The Pulmonologist has decided to take another week off from work without anyone covering for him so, we won't get results from him til sometime next week.  The Cardiologist who read the tests, won't tell me the results because technically, Sam isn't his patient and he felt the doctor who ordered the test should discuss the options, not him.  I explained the whole situation to several nurses today but they too, were lacking patience and understanding.

I called back to the lab and asked if they would fax me the results.  Nope.  Not going to happen through that avenue either.

So, I got this great idea to call our family doc and have him request the records.  I was really hopeful that would work but I got stuck trying to get through the Berlin Wall of secretaries who think they know what they are talking about but don't.

At first, I just asked to speak to a nurse because I know all the nurses personally.  She wouldn't send me back and insisted on a message.  I insisted it was really confusing but she insisted I tell her.  So, I did.

Just as I thought, she was confused.  Then she started explaining to me that a radiologist reads ultrasounds not cardiologists...

Three times, I tried to explain to her that in this case, it was the actual Cardiologist who will do Sam's surgery if it turns out he needs it, who read the echo studies.  She kept telling me I was confused.

So, in an effort to be patient and not lose my temper.  I just kindly asked her to have a nurse or doctor call me and admitted defeat and stupidity.  What do I know?

I find it so unfair for a doctor to put the fear of death in you by saying that he's 98% sure your kid needs surgery and before the end of the year so he's still around and confirm that he is having mini strokes and then leave for two weeks without anyone covering your patients.   I'm certain he's enjoying his vacation while I am trying so hard to make the best of things and be patient and keep Sam occupied so his mind doesn't wander into the worst case scenarios.  It's really hard!  I try to stay in the moment but I have caught myself wandering into the nethermost reaches of 'What if', several times today.

I almost feel like medicine is nothing more than another big box retailer and human emotions are a thing of the past; something vintage, to be treasured if you ever stumble upon a doctor who truly cares.  Pretty soon, I'm going to be telling my kids stories that begin...I remember when you were little, we had a doctor who actually called me to see how you were doing.

No lie, I got a call while I was at work this morning from a doctor who did blood work on Shelbie December 1.  They were just calling to give me the results that were only suppose to take 24 hours to get.  I had totally forgotten all about that visit and when he said how ridiculously long ago that was,  I just laughed and said, "Really, we are already on to the next big thing.  It's a little late, we already figured that problem out."  Sheesh.

The saving grace for today was that we have some awesome company visiting and new friends.  They have been such a breath of fresh air and the kids have seemed to really enjoy each other.  If it wasn't for them, today would have been that much harder.

Tomorrow, I am thinking of driving down to the lab and requesting a copy of the testing myself.  I'm not so sure they can deny me since I am the mother and I am the one footing the bill for this.  We'll see how I feel in the morning.  It's not that hard to read a test report and if Sam does in fact need surgery then I can at least get on the books with the Cardiologist and spare us another week of waiting.  

How foolish for me to think this could be done by the end of the year!



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