This is juicy...
I want to buy a juicer. Just a juicer to juice juicy things. I am not interested in drinking my carrots or celery. I'm not interested in juicing peanuts or avocados or any of the other crazy things people load into a juicer. Incidentally, just for fun, I Googled if you can juice an avocado and the answer is NO. In case you were wondering...but apparently, people have actually tried it!!! Ha ha ha....Those crazy juicers! That's the juiciest tip you will read here! ANYHOO...
Off I go to Amazon because...they have an awesome collection of everything you need and a bunch of stuff you really don't need but think you need. I'm beginning to think after my 10 min. of window shopping that I really don't need a juicer. Mostly because...you can't just buy a simple juicer!!! I'm exhausted and in the effort I made in trying to process just page one of options...I could have eaten a whole orchard of lemons!
Here's what I'm up against...
Do you want an extractor instead? Is a juicer the same thing as an extractor?
Do I want a center knife blade or is centrifugal force enough?
Is 400 Watts going to do the job or do I need 850 Watts?
Then they have juicers for first time juicers and pros? Isn't a juicer for first time juicers THIS?
I'm a first time juicer but I don't want THAT, I want to feel like a pro.
Then, we get into masticating juicers! I have no idea what that is and really, by this time, I'm just thinking...Do I really want to do this anyways? I didn't have time to buzz over to Wikipedia to read all about what Masticating means so I guess I will just be in the dark about that feature for...maybe the rest of my life. I hope I don't regret not learning about that...I hate living with regret!
But...I forge ahead and continue shopping.
Do I want a fast juicer or a slow juicer? Well, I think the picture above is the slow juicer so...I want a fast juicer. If I wanted a slow juicer, I would just buy that thingy.
6500 RPMs or 16000 RPMs? I'm not looking for a car engine...just a freaking juicer!!!
Still...we haven't even addressed the issue of pulp! Here we go!
Do I want a pulp collector or a froth separator?
Do I want an extra large pulp bin so I can juice longer? I'm not planning to make a day of my juicing...I just really want a little bit of lemon juice and then carry on with my list of more important things to do like...living, not juicing. This is not going to be a way of life for me, a hobby or a sport! I'm not going to be entering my juice in the fair and I'm not in 4H.
There is the auto pulp ejection feature which sounds interesting because I don't like pulp. This is from the makers of the Omega juicer- it must be the end all and be all of all juicers! ;)
There is even one juicer that comes with a DVD!!! It didn't say what the movie is but I guess this model must be for the juicer that wants to juice for a long time. Must be the slow juicer. I don't have time for a movie first thing in the morning so I probably won't buy this one!
I love some of the juicer names like the Juice Fountain, Duo Dual Disc Juicer...that name pretty much says it all doesn't it? I wonder if the guy that came up with that got a big promotion? Genius!
How about the Ninja Master Prep? Or...the Jack Lalanne PJP Power Juicer Pro Electric Juicer! Remember Jack Lalanne and his infomercials? Classic.
Well, after all this, I'm not really sure what I want anymore. Maybe juicing just isn't for me because the thing is...I have a life. I have a life beyond my kitchen and a few exotic fruits. I'm not really sure how juicing can be healthy because I now have an ulcer from trying to select the right juicer for me and ulcers are not healthy. Not only that, I'm pretty stressed about juicing, not to mention anxious. Maybe I'll just stick to my daily dose of Pepsi!
Off I go to Amazon because...they have an awesome collection of everything you need and a bunch of stuff you really don't need but think you need. I'm beginning to think after my 10 min. of window shopping that I really don't need a juicer. Mostly because...you can't just buy a simple juicer!!! I'm exhausted and in the effort I made in trying to process just page one of options...I could have eaten a whole orchard of lemons!
Here's what I'm up against...
Do you want an extractor instead? Is a juicer the same thing as an extractor?
Do I want a center knife blade or is centrifugal force enough?
Is 400 Watts going to do the job or do I need 850 Watts?
Then they have juicers for first time juicers and pros? Isn't a juicer for first time juicers THIS?
I'm a first time juicer but I don't want THAT, I want to feel like a pro.
Then, we get into masticating juicers! I have no idea what that is and really, by this time, I'm just thinking...Do I really want to do this anyways? I didn't have time to buzz over to Wikipedia to read all about what Masticating means so I guess I will just be in the dark about that feature for...maybe the rest of my life. I hope I don't regret not learning about that...I hate living with regret!
But...I forge ahead and continue shopping.
Do I want a fast juicer or a slow juicer? Well, I think the picture above is the slow juicer so...I want a fast juicer. If I wanted a slow juicer, I would just buy that thingy.
6500 RPMs or 16000 RPMs? I'm not looking for a car engine...just a freaking juicer!!!
Still...we haven't even addressed the issue of pulp! Here we go!
Do I want a pulp collector or a froth separator?
Do I want an extra large pulp bin so I can juice longer? I'm not planning to make a day of my juicing...I just really want a little bit of lemon juice and then carry on with my list of more important things to do like...living, not juicing. This is not going to be a way of life for me, a hobby or a sport! I'm not going to be entering my juice in the fair and I'm not in 4H.
There is the auto pulp ejection feature which sounds interesting because I don't like pulp. This is from the makers of the Omega juicer- it must be the end all and be all of all juicers! ;)
There is even one juicer that comes with a DVD!!! It didn't say what the movie is but I guess this model must be for the juicer that wants to juice for a long time. Must be the slow juicer. I don't have time for a movie first thing in the morning so I probably won't buy this one!
I love some of the juicer names like the Juice Fountain, Duo Dual Disc Juicer...that name pretty much says it all doesn't it? I wonder if the guy that came up with that got a big promotion? Genius!
How about the Ninja Master Prep? Or...the Jack Lalanne PJP Power Juicer Pro Electric Juicer! Remember Jack Lalanne and his infomercials? Classic.
Well, after all this, I'm not really sure what I want anymore. Maybe juicing just isn't for me because the thing is...I have a life. I have a life beyond my kitchen and a few exotic fruits. I'm not really sure how juicing can be healthy because I now have an ulcer from trying to select the right juicer for me and ulcers are not healthy. Not only that, I'm pretty stressed about juicing, not to mention anxious. Maybe I'll just stick to my daily dose of Pepsi!
I love it, Kathy!
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