The Rest of the Story

Well, our awesome docs called tonight but I actually saw one of our doctors who is actually in our ward and is my home teacher and gave me the news in person.  Spencer will need his gall bladder out.  It is not even functioning!  I am relieved that they have found the cause of his nausea but I feel bad that I let it go on so long just thinking it was an adjustment needed in his enzymes.  I think everyone of the doctors watching over Spencer was surprised by the news. 

     It's hard to say how Spencer feels about all this news.  He is really good at keeping it all inside.  I can tell he is bummed that he will be down for his birthday since the surgery will most likely take place the first part of next week.  At the same time though, waiting a week will still put him down for his birthday since he is so sick. 

     I am tired, really tired.  When I think about going through this next week it makes me feel like I just spent 8 hours at Chuck A Rama and am now boarding the worlds craziest rollercoaster!  I do not want to do this.  I do not want to feel my stomach flopping around like a dead fish while I wait for him to get out of surgery.  In about 6 weeks, we will be doing it all over again as all three kids will be having their bone marrow biopsies. 

     Again, I just feel stupid because I know this isn't brain surgery and I shouldn't even be bothered by it but everything that happens to a chronically ill child is magnified by a billion whether good or bad.  There are so many other questions now that will have to be answered.  For instance, what happens now when he already struggles to process fat?  Without a gall bladder, I can just imagine the complications that could arise.  This is where I need to focus on the moment and not go off on my future tangents.  sigh.....
     On a different sort of note...I have a good friend, she is 15 years old and was just diagnosed with Breast Cancer.  A very rare and aggressive form.  If you have a moment, maybe remember her in your thoughts and prayers.  Let's just call her Sage, Heavenly Father will know who she is.  She loved hanging out with us when she would come to town to visit her dad and step brother and step mom and always asked if I would 'adopt' her.  She even called me 'mom'.  I told her if she was going to be my daughter, she would have to change her name to an 'S' name.  Well she always wanted to be named Sage so that is what we call her.  Today she started radiation and chemotherapy.   It can always be least a gall bladder problem will be gone soon.


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