Sunday, March 18, 2012

Sunday Best

Sundays are the best day of the week.  It's a time to take a break from the craziness of the week and reload for the chaos that awaits. 

I love that fact that I can get my perspective back in line and start out the week fresh.  I am not very good at relaying the emotional stress associated with chronic illness, especially when it's my own story I'm telling but give me some stats and research, physical things and I can write on forever.  Sometimes, the emotions run so deep and become so complex, I can scarcely find words to describe what this feels like.  All I can say is that one moment you feel desperate and then next, empowered and then there's everything in between.   My job is to adjust my thoughts accordingly and somehow be able to transition smoothly, seamlessly and calmly between them all and keep the kids on an even keel despite all the ups and downs I feel as their mom.  That's not to say, they too don't have their coaster ride of chaos and then my job becomes even more important.  I have to be the shock absorber and that is so tiring and isolating.

Shelbie has hung in there this weekend until early this morning.  Since the early morning hours, I've been keeping her head wrapped in ice and trying to stay on top of the pain and nausea.  Hopefully tonight she will perk up and turn that proverbial corner. 

Spencer had a rough weekend with some new symptoms mixed in with the old.  Let's just say there's been a lot of dizziness, nausea, uncontrollable sweats, extreme weakness.  It just reassures me that going to Seattle this coming weekend is the right thing to do. 

It will be a busy, busy week as I try to get ahead of some work since I will be out of commission for a few days while we sort things out in Seattle. It will be a challenging week.   

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