Skip to main content

But...

The past few night have been so rough!  It happens now and again, the kids, Shelbie especially, starts questioning her time left on earth and I am hammered with all sorts of questions like how will I live without her, what if all the kids die at once, then I will be alone.  "What if all this talk of life after death is just a hoax?" What if... and but, but, but. It becomes exhausting and after nearly two hours of answering her questions, reassuring her that she is not dying, promising her that things will work out...she calmed down.  It's usually well after midnight before everyone is settled down for the night.  Thankfully, Spencer was backing me up with his comedic antics and trying to lighten the very, heavy, somber feeling!

Sam, out of the blue, spiked a fever this week and was miserable so all this talk of death and dying was not sitting well with him.  After getting everyone sufficiently comfortable, on the living room floor because they needed to sleep together, again...(The only reason we have bedrooms in this house is so they have a place to dump their clothes and shoes.  If I would let them, they would sleep together every night of their life.) I fell into bed myself. 

It has been such an exhausting week and in the mix is a ton of work I need to get done for all these little jobs I have acquired the past two weeks.

Looking at the events of the last two weeks, there is no doubt this has been a 'scheduled intervention' from Heaven.  I have gotten 4 design jobs in the last two weeks.  I thought, "Great, I almost have enough money to pay my bills without taking most of it from my dwindling savings."  I should know better than to assume I could actually get ahead.  Whenever I come into a little bit of money, some crisis or disaster hits and I continue to chase the dream of being self sufficient. On the other hand, I can see how God has prepared me for this and blessed me accordingly so I hardly have room to complain. 

Today, we sit in the hospital.  Shelbie's transfusion just got underway and she is resting comfortably for now.  Sam made it to school today though his cough is still pretty bad and Spencer is hanging in there.  The new Crohn's medication is actually helping him with his pain but the nausea is still hanging in there.  We did get some of the tests back and his lipase level is abnormally low and I have yet to find out what this means.  It's significant since he takes lipase in his pancreatic enzymes whenever he eats food so it's odd that it is so low.

This weekend, I will be swamped with work that needs to be done before we leave for Seattle so as they say...No rest for the wicked.





Photobucket

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

Post Trauma

This week is definitely one for the books and one I hope to never repeat.  You would think that after 12 years of being divorced, there would be little left to argue about and spend energy being contentious but it seems that is not the case.  We have a history of ups and downs and currently, we are in a downward turn and honestly, I don't see that we will ever enjoy the 'ups' again.  So, it's been sad and the most emotional taxing week!

The kids were suppose to be in Utah for a huge Independence Day Celebration with their dad and new step family.  It was to consist of Seven Peaks, Fireworks, and a Hunter Hayes concert.  All that changed so they were home and not too happy about the circumstances.

I had three broken and depressed kids on my hands so I knew I had to come up with something to soften the edges of this week.

Up in the Teton Valley is a hot air balloon festival every July 1st.  You don't see hot air balloons very often in our part of the world.  Back …

Untitled...

I have had a lot of time to think about what to title this post.  I'm still undecided.  Here are some options...

Testing...
This is just a test.
Full Circle
Redemption
The wonders of God
Missing pieces
Borrowed Time

Shelbie had her neurology appointment yesterday.  About a month ago, a nurse called to tell me our neurologist wanted to see Shelbie.  That has rarely happened, that a doctor calls me to see my kids, so there was no hesitation in my response.

We waited over an hour and a half for the doctor to get to our room.  We kept occupied with Snapchat filters, GIFs and stupid Memes.  Everything seemed funny but I had the worst gnawing feeling that all that was about to change.

The doctor came and in said, "So, how are you handling this latest development and do you have any questions about Epilepsy?"

She was talking a mile a minute and describing in detail how she arrived at this diagnosis.  "Any questions?"  She paused to ask.

I remembered one time, I was …

Blissful thinking

This has just been a week of stuff...lots of hard stuff so it only seemed fitting to finish things off with a trip to the dentist.  I hate the dentist.  I have always hated the dentist.  I will always hate the dentist.

I had to have a root canal.

I figured I could either be upset and cranky and whine and complain or try to make the best of it.

So...I tried to make the best of it.

I am not very good at taking care of myself and I'm especially not good at asking other people to help me take care of myself or take care of anything really so, when the dental assistants ask if I need anything, I always say, "I'm fine."

Not yesterday.  Nope. I am a tired and cranky woman, on Prednisone, with an abscess in my ear to boot!

Just before I left for the dentist, I dug through the sofa cushions to find some left over Valium.  I was really intent on making this a good experience! They say that attitude is everything!  It's not what happens to you, but how you choose to deal …