All the things

I'm a whole week behind on all the things...Mother's Day was Sunday but so was the anniversary date of when I got married...This year would have been 29 years!   It was also the anniversary date of my divorce...15 years!   That's about all I'm going to say about any of that.   Well, I will say I was glad to have had a chance to wish my mom a happy Mother's Day.  She's been an example of tenacity and strength and faces every hardship I have ever seen her face, with courage and determination.   Many times over the past month, I have been grateful that I learned all of those things from her.  

Yesterday we celebrated 22 years of Sam!  What a great son I have.  He is a quiet kind of soul.  He faces whatever the day holds as if it is completely unexpected and without judgement.  I wish, in some ways, I could live like that.   We had to be in Utah and so it made sense to celebrate there so that he could spend some time with his dad and Spence.  I didn't think we would be doing much other than dinner and cake but we decided, quite spontaneously to go to a trampoline park that was open, much to my surprise.  I hate trampoline parks but I love Sam and it wasn't bad.  We practically had the 60,000 sq. foot park to ourselves and played some escape games as well.   Sam enjoyed the day immensely and I was happy to see him relaxing and enjoying the things he loves so much. 

My sweet Sam at age 2!  

On Wednesday evening, my Wasband and I met Spencer's soon to be in-laws for dinner.  I'm sure it wasn't any more awkward for the in-laws than it was for me.  The plan had always been that Spencer and Ashtin would ride in to Salt Lake from Provo with us, but one thing after another transpired and it didn't work that way so it was my Wasband and I in one car and met them at the restaurant.  Can you imagine if your daughter tells you that you are going to meet your Fiance's parents for dinner but they are divorced...I think her dad had to double check more than once they would be dining with both of us!  ha ha...It's weird.  Most divorced people can't even be civil to each other let alone eat a meal with pleasantries and all.   

They seem like lovely people.   They seem to appreciate Spencer and the way he has treated their daughter.  They mentioned that he is the first guy who has actually treated her with respect and didn't do anything immoral or offensive.  I have never been worried about my boys and the way they treat a young woman.  

Over dinner we mostly made small talk.  It feels like it was 6 months ago already.  Afterwards, we went to the venue where they will be married and when I say 'venue', I mean the 10 million dollar home with accompanying back yard!   My Wasband has friends in high places.  This was a house he had designed and it was very nice of the owners to allow us to use their back yard for the wedding in just three weeks.  They are neighbors to Mitt Romney and we had to pass through not one, but two iron gates to get to the house.   

It was so overwhelming to see the place.  I felt like I belonged in the bathrooms cleaning toilets...sort of a fish out of water but at the same time, it really was so beautiful and I know Ashtin and Spencer were so appreciative.  

Adulting is hard.  It's been a tough week for these kids as they have had to face the reality of starting a new life together in the midst of a pandemic when jobs are scarce and both are unemployed at the moment.  They are brave and I have watched them work through these hard conversations that always seem to revolve around money, with a lot of patience and determination.   Spencer will move into their little apartment this coming week.  It is barely 500 sq. feet but it's okay, they have no furniture so it should be an easy move!  ha ha.  I bought them their pots and pans, dishes and flatware so what more could they need?  

Spencer did comment that he was grateful to be getting married now when everything could be small and simple and not feel the pressure to throw a big celebration.  They are both very excited to just quietly and simply get married.   There will be nothing to decorate, no invitations to send, no receptions here there and everywhere.   The wedding will be limited to just 20 people and that is including the Bishop and his wife and one of Spencer's friends who offered to video tape the wedding.  That feels just right.  

Someone forgot to tell me how hard it is to watch your child get married.