The Big 5-0

I can hardly believe that I turned 50 on Sunday.  50?!!  That's like grandma age.  That's the age your 16 year old self called 'old'.  You've lived more than half your life by the time you turn 50!! I can't even! 

I have never cared one bit about any other birthday but this one.  I don't know what it is but it just doesn't sit right with me.  I look at all the things I do on a given day, and I often act like I'm 18 years old.  I laugh at the dumbest things...still.  I'm basically the farthest thing from an adult you can get!  Maybe it's not really the number that bothers me but the in-congruent feelings I have.  That must be it.  If I'm being honest, I do feel like my time is running out and that makes me feel slightly anxious as well...If I don't hurry up and decide what I want to do when I grow up, it will be too late!! You know what I mean?

It was a low key day, very low key.  The kids have been out of sorts the past several days.  Spencer has been horribly sick with his gastroparesis.  He barely got that calmed down and his Scleritis came back and his whole eyeball swelled up.  It's an autoimmune disease he came down with right after he got home from his mission 3 years ago.  It flares up every so often.   Through all of this, he had to go out of town on a commercial shoot down in Moab and Arizona.  I sure missed him. 

Shelbie is not doing well after last week down at the U of U medical center.  Her white count is just over triple what it should be and some other counts are not looking good.  I need to get her in to the Hematologist/Oncologist soon I think. 

Then there's Sam!  He's doing amazing!  Yay, for turning that sinking ship around.   We've had some really great visits, made some plans and that seemed to make all the difference.  He has found a new passion and spends every single waking moment out in the garage learning everything there is to learn about resins.   It's so nice to see him happy after such a long, dark time fighting depression.  He saw the Cardiologist yesterday and things continue to trend down for his heart.  I couldn't go with him because of conflicting appointments for myself so he went solo.   I wasn't expecting anything other than a pacemaker check.  Turns out, his lower heart chamber is slowing way down.  6 months ago, they turned down the second wire because it was shocking the lower part of his heart too much and the doctor was afraid it would tire out his heart too fast.  I think the doctor felt that it really wasn't needed and the pacemaker was needlessly responding.  Well, turns out that wasn't the case.  Sam's lower portion of the heart is slowing down and the second wire is shocking him nearly 10% of the time.  The cardiologist seems unsure of what to do yet, so we will watch that.  He's also had several incidences of sudden tachycardia, his heart races to 200 bpm.  This is not a good sign and again, they aren't sure what this means or what to do about it.

Anyways, I was saying all this to say that my birthday was pretty quiet.  My friend invited us out for dinner on Sunday and that was perfect.  Her little girl drew me a sweet little card.  Tuesday night, all the kids cousins came over and they had a bake off to see who could bake me the best cake.  I did a blind taste test.  Honestly, they all did such an amazing job.  These kids actually belong to my Wasband but they still claim me and I claim them!  I'm so grateful they feel loved in my home.

Shelbie and Sam made a lemon poppy seed cake from scratch.  Shelbie's decorating won for most professional cake! 

Sam's sweet girlfriend made a Better Than Whatever Cake.  It was fabulous! 

My nephew Chase and his sweet wife made a cake to look like a pepperoni pizza and even put it in a pizza box!!  It's so me!

My niece Rachel and her brand new husband made a Tres Leche cake.  Divine!! 

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My nephew Connor and his wife made me!!  Ha ha...You can't really tell on the photo but they even made Bentley in my cupcake arms!   So hilarious! 

It was such a fun night.  They brought the cakes already made so it was super easy.  We laughed so hard and that was such a welcome dose of happiness!  

So, here's to 50!