Taps

I was 'today' old, when I found out that there are actually lyrics to the military song, Taps but not only that, the song is actually called Butterfield's Lullaby.

Day is done, gone the sun,

From the lake, from the hills, from the sky;

All is well, safely rest, God is nigh.

Fading light, dims the sight,

And a star gems the sky, gleaming bright.

From afar, drawing nigh, falls the night.

Thanks and praise, for our days,

'Neath the sun, 'neath the stars, neath the sky;

As we go, this we know, God is nigh.

Sun has set, shadows come,

Time has fled, Soldiers must go to their beds

Always true to the promise that they made.

While the light fades from sight,

And the stars gleaming rays softly send,

To thy hands we our souls, Lord, commend.

I love the words.  

'As we go, this we know, God is nigh.' 

I needed to be reminded of these words today.  It's been discouraging and frustrating the past couple of days.

I've been living the last few months on shoulder injections, the last injection wore off about 3 weeks ago and I've been struggling along, trying to not show how much pain I'm in.  I lost that battle on Sunday night.  I've lost almost all range of motion now.  I have reached the threshold of allowable cortisone injections so now I have to consider surgery.  I will meet with my surgeon in two weeks.  I can't imagine how I will work when my dominant arm will be out of commission.  It's out of commission now...I have it in a sling in hopes of resting the joint and get some inflammation down.  I'm so depressed about it.  I've seen the ultrasounds, the x rays, it's pretty bad but...

As we go, this we know, God is nigh.

Samuel does in fact have a kidney problem again.  The Urologist has proven to be better than I thought she was going to be.  She sent orders up here for our family doc to do some further testing.  Sam's blood pressure remains quite high.  The last of the tests will be back tomorrow, at which point, I will probably move ahead with Nephrology again and hold off on anymore work with the Urologist.  

I'm so proud of Sam.  I couldn't be there today so he got in, asked all the right questions and handled it like a champ.  I gave him our blood pressure cuff on the weekend so he could log his blood pressure and when I called him after my meetings to check on things, he had recorded all of his readings which will be very good information to give the Nephrologist. This time, they can't brush it off as an infection, since he has no infection.  There is something more serious going on. 

As we go, this we know, God is nigh.

Spencer is just over 24 hours away from leaving for Africa.  He has been greatly blessed in regard to the Yellow Fever Vaccine I've been concerned about.  So far, no symptoms and they said the first 7 days were the most critical.  Tomorrow, he starts the medication for Malaria.  Today, he received an internship offer from a big production company in San Francisco.   It would be a paid position.  He's so excited but my heart sank...let's just get through Africa first...then Peru in May and we'll talk about moving to California in June...but first... He had a blessing on Sunday so...

As we go, this we know, God is nigh.

Just so I don't mislead anyone, I'm not strong.  These are merely hopeful words on a page and spoken by the hour in my heart, as waves of worry pound my mind.  I am making a big effort to not despair and just do the needful thing and let God work on the details.

As we go, this we know, God is nigh.