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At Least I'm Not Dead

This morning, I got a call from the Social Security Administration telling me my social security number had been suspended.  It was a recorded call and they left a number that I was to call back in order to figure out what had happened.

I was quite concerned about this news but didn't think anything of the fact that it was a recorded call because every month, the IRS calls me to remind me about the money I owe them and it's a recorded call.  Anyways, I took down the number and called them right back.

There was an obnoxious calling tree just as you would expect from a government entity.  When I finally made it to a human being, sirens went off in my head!  The guy could barely speak two English words.  Before I even told him why I was calling, he asked for my name and birthdate.  I hung up in a big hurry.  I had a sick feeling it was fraudulent.

I looked up the social security administrations number and called them to find out what was going on. What happened next was kind of funny.

I told the guy what had happened and he said, "M'am, your social security number will never be suspended for any reason.  We may close your number out if you are dead but that's the only reason you wouldn't have a number.  Would you like me to look up your number and make sure you aren't dead?"

"Huh?  I'm not dead.  I'm talking to you.  I feel like I'm dead but you probably don't care about that."
The guy didn't even chuckle but went right on with his thoughts.  "Well, if someone gets a hold of your number, they can claim you as dead.  So I'll see if you're dead in our system.  Do you want me to?"

I really didn't want him to, but it might have been the most fun I had all week so I said, "Yeah, let's do that."  I might have secretly been hoping I was dead because that would have made for a great story and maybe I could get out of paying my tax bill.  A girl can hope.

So, good news!  I'm not dead!  I get to keep on keeping on!  However, the guy asked why I'm not an American Citizen and urged me to apply for citizenship.  I said, "Well, I don't think now is an ideal time to be stirring the pot of immigration.  I think I'll just ride out my Green Card a little longer and see what pans out with this government."  Ha ha...he didn't find that too funny.

All in all, it was a good day to be alive...for the most part.  I'm still a little bugged that someone had the nerve to steal my identity right in front of my face!



  1. I'm glad you're not dead. :) When I get scammers like that, I usually pull out a super dramatic high and mighty voice and tell them they will have to face God someday for being thieves and liars. They usually hang up first and it definitely is the most fun I have sometimes.


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