Skip to main content

Getting it together

It's been an interesting week of sorts.  Busy as usual.

Tuesday, we went back to the homeless shelter to drop off gifts to our new friend Carla.  I had called her just to remind her that we were coming.  She asked if we could meet her somewhere else instead so we met in a parking lot a few blocks away.  She was so happy but I have a feeling she is one of those people who just manages to smile regardless of the burdens she carries.

She had asked us to come to her apartment for tea after her class at the battered women's shelter but since I work nights, we had to decline.  We packed her car up with presents and gave her and the littles a hug.

As we drove off, both of my kids said, "Do you get the feeling she has her life together more than we do?"

Ya, I kind of did.  In fact, I was trying not to cry because in so many ways, she seemed much better off than us.  In a lot of ways, we are still clamoring to get our feet back under us.  At the end of the day, the image stuck in my mind is that moment when you hit an unseen patch of ice and are about to go down but you do everything in your power to stay upright?  Ya, that's about what life feels like...every day.

I did get Christmas shopping started and done and that feels a little better.  I haven't even thought about baking anything but I'm not really sure I care.

I'm not sure what to do to get things together again.  I have been in this Lupus flare all week and that is not helping matters.  I just can't escape the pain and inflammation and overwhelming fatigue!  Blah...



Popular posts from this blog

Obscure Sorrows

I sat on the bench like I usually do on Saturday mornings, the organ music was slow and quiet.  I think that's why I like playing there; its just slow and quiet.  I set the pace.  I mostly keep my eye on the music for fear of messing up but I did notice a couple walk in.  I had known them a few years ago, not well, but enough.  Enough to notice each other and say Hi.  I had heard recently that she had breast cancer.  She's likely a good 10 years younger than me.  Her red wig was striking, her eyebrows carefully in place and by all accounts, she made cancer look good.  
I had the strangest feeling I've never had before.  She has no idea, that somehow, I know all about her recent strife with cancer.  I have heard how it struck, how she deals; I know more than a distant acquaintance like me should know.   She is living this complicated, unfair, story that went off in a way she scarcely expected.  For a moment, I felt like I was an extra in her 3rd act; the struggle.  And, I wo…

A Witness

I was expecting just another run of the mill night at the gym last night.  The kind where the 'meat heads' stay at their end of the gym grunting and groaning to sound strong and I would claim a little corner in the room where the Yogi's hang out and Plank, and there I would Spin on a bike for a few miles, do some rowing, a little TRX and finish up with some free weights.

Last night though, I actually decided to do an easier workout and took an inclined walk on the treadmill.  There were no meat heads in far end of the gym.  No one really at the gym at all.  For the longest time, I kept pace with an old guy on a bike behind me.

But then, a man and his son came in.  I knew them.  I knew them well but they don't know just how well I know them.  They have a son who passed away from Cystic Fibrosis a little while ago, he would have been Spencer's age now.  They have a younger son who also has CF.  I knew his wife and mother in law back when my kids were being diagnosed.…


It has been an emotional weekend!  Holy Smokes.  I need a vacation from being sensitive.

It's been months since I have been able to find my homeless friend May.

Monday, I had this overwhelming feeling that she was in trouble and it dawned on me that I should call the apartment where she was last known to be.  They didn't answer.  They didn't answer my call all week!  Finally, yesterday (Friday) they called me back.  I was afraid that they wouldn't give me any information about May since I wasn't family so I lied!  I told them she was my great Aunt.  The manager hummed and hawed and finally gave the phone to a man who wondered what I wanted with her.  After some convincing, he told me that she had been arrested and taken to the State Mental Hospital.

I was so sad!  I immediately called the State Hospital and asked if I could speak to her but of course, they can't tell me if she is there or not...and, I couldn't remember her first, legal name.  She has sever…