Friday, July 22, 2016

The Width of Life

Today didn't exactly go as planned.  Not in a bad way, in a surprising way.

9:30 this morning, I received a phone call from one of the hospital administrators who asked if Shelbie would be willing to have her picture taken to hang in the hospital in the new infusion therapy department.  I was really surprised!

The administrators decided that they wanted black and white photos of some of their long time infusion patients to hang in the corridor of the new infusion therapy.   It was even more fitting that it so happens that their long term infusion patient is also a patient at Huntsman Cancer Center...Oh, that is fitting because our hospital is officially a satellite cancer clinic for Huntsman!  Yay for mighty miracles! This is huge news which I will elaborate on later.

Shelbie was excited to participate in this way and hurried to get ready for professional photos from the hospital photographer.  Along with her picture hanging larger than life in the new unit, they asked her to include what inspires her to keep going.

That is a long list of people, things and thoughts.  She narrowed it down to one saying by Diane Ackerman that has inspired her.
I have thought about this quote all day.  Sometimes, all I ever think about is the length of my life.  With blinders on, I look ahead to what is coming next.  I never stop to consider the possibilities of anything more than what I already do.  Those things you do because, it's just what you do.  You do what is expected of you, what people have learned to count on, rarely deviating off the beaten path and designated course.

I think about my kids and how much they veer off from the length of their life to include the width as well.  They do this very well!  Some better than others but I see a width and depth to their life, not just a length.  As a mostly uptight mom with a mission to live a safe, lengthy life, I can sometimes make the mistake of squelching the width out of their fun.

I usually come around.  I found very quickly that I could either embrace their daring spirit or lose the chance to be proud of their accomplishments and fearlessness.

I guess it boils back down to my realizations yesterday while at our appointment in Utah.  My kids really don't look as sick on the outside as they are on the inside.  Shelbie continues to set goals and stretch herself to keep on going even when giving up would be completely understandable and even acceptable.

It's something to think about.  Next weekend, the boys will be expanding the width of their life with a bucket list activity...Skydiving.  I'm not extremely excited about this but I will be there cheering them on and witnessing their daring spirit as they follow their 'Must'.

Everyday I learn something new from my kids.  It is inspiring to see them step up to life and never back down, even laugh in the face of adversity. It is that spirit that gets us through.

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