Friday, June 3, 2016

Shoulds and Musts

Every month, I try to take an online class of some sort.  I don't really have an agenda, it's something I do so my mind doesn't get lost in medical drama, kid drama, world drama...just something small that challenges me.

This month, I am taking a class from Elle Luna over at Skillshare.  It's called Choose Must.  She is an artist who has written a book on finding your passion.  It has been a fascinating class and I wonder every day about my MUST.   While I dream of my must, Spencer lives his must.

My boys have always lived their must but Spencer especially, excels at it.  He grabs life by the horns, harnesses the energy of every minute and doesn't look back.  The month of May, he spent padding around the Pacific Northwest and Canada.  He was the brains behind this adventure and roped 7 other guys into the trip. So, with very few funds, a rented van and a duffle bag, he set out to follow his Must.

Week one...the scruff on his face makes him look so old! 

For three weeks, they slept under the stars in hammocks.  He had an amazing time.  Spencer was truly in his element.  The guys made it home last Monday so we had a big bbq for the weary travelers and enjoyed looking at his videos and photos.  They found the most beautiful places that I will probably never see because I never venture far from the beaten down path.

I was a little jealous that he has found his passion at such a young age.

Week three...a face only a mother could love!  I'm not a fan of the beard but he seems quite attached to it! 

Their sleeping arrangements on whatever tree they deemed suitable in whatever forest they happened to be in.  A hammock snack for bears!  

He stuck around all week while his buddies headed back to Utah for job hunting.  We have had a good week having him around.  Since his mission, we have the best talks late at night and I'm surprised when I discover that he often takes my advice!   He's definitely trying to find his way in life and that isn't easy but hopefully, he will stick to the process.

Towards the end of the week, his girlfriend came up to spend a day or two.  The two were friends in middle school until she moved with her family. I never really knew her, other than she was probably Spencer's first heartbreak over a girl back then.  I find it interesting that their paths have crossed again.

She is a really sweet girl!  We had a great couple of days getting to know her.  We laughed a lot and she seems to really like Spencer.  She stayed here so it was interesting to see them interact with one another.

I will say, it was so sweet to watch Spencer fix her breakfast, clear her dishes when she was done. He tenderly took care of her.  I'll tell you one thing...whoever gets that boy is going to be one lucky girl. He has a sweet heart.

Later today, after she left, we were talking about 'things'.  As I watched Spencer with her, I asked why it is that men don't continue to treat their wives like that after a few kids have arrived and life settles in around them.  I'm sure there are some men who do, maybe a lot of men, but mostly, we become comfortable and let that tenderness toughen up a bit I think... if I ever have the opportunity to get married again, I would certainly work harder to stay tender and attentive.  I may have issued this as a challenge to him. (wink, wink)

Tomorrow he heads back to life in Utah.  We will miss him so much but he has more MUSTS to live but a few shoulds too...like he should get a job.  ;)
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