Friday, November 7, 2014

The bathroom

Yesterday, on our way home from Sam's appointment, I stopped in the city to pick something up for an Open House I am helping a client with.   Before I started shopping, I ran into the bathroom.

There was no lock on the cubicle door but there was no one in the bathroom either so I wasn't too concerned.  But then, I heard the door open and in walks another woman.  Public bathrooms are just awkward places on a good day, when everyone just ignores each other and goes about their business.

Well, I can tell this woman is going to try to get into the stall I'm in, so I reach my arm out to keep the door closed.  Sure enough, she proceeds to push on it and I'm trying to keep it closed.

After her third attempt, I said, "Someone is in here!"  That sentence alone is so awkward...what do you say?  "I'm in here."?  There's hardly time to start assessing good grammar when some stranger is trying to break down your cubicle door!

She finally stops pushing and says, "Well, I need to put something in there!!"


Again...there are no words to respond with so I just sat there...awkward silence ensued. What was I suppose to say..."I'm putting something in here right now?"  I don't know...what in the world did she need to put in my toilet stall!!

I actually panicked for a second and wondered if I had inadvertently walked into the storage closet or something by mistake to pee. I took a quick inventory of the cubicle just to be sure...toilet paper, toilet...yep, I believe I am in the right place.  I even made sure the toilet was actually hooked up.  Yes, I really did.  You may be laughing but I remembered hearing a true story that happened to Mr. Bean.  He was a dinner party and ended up with some gastric issues...if you know what I mean.  He asked where the restroom was in this mansion where the dinner was.  They directed him down the hall.  He ran in, in distress, sat down and relieved himself.  As he was feeling better, he looked around the room and was horrified to discover he was in the Owner's home office!!!  They had been remodeling the bathroom and sat the old toilet in the den until they could get it moved out to the dumpster!  Here he was, sitting on a toilet, in an office, in a mansion and toilet paper! I have never forgotten that story!! I would have died...a million times over!

So, anyways.  It was one of the most awkward bathroom moments ever!  I was really hoping she would leave but she was just parked outside my door.  There were two other stalls!  Wide open and free to accept deliveries!  But there she stood...outside my door!  I had to stare her in the eyes when I walked out!  Most uncomfortable!

When I finally got up the courage to leave, she said, "Sorry.  I just needed to get in there!"

"hahaha" nervous laughter...


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